Treat People With Kindness: The story behind the song
A deep dive into Harry Styles’ most upbeat, most feel-good song
My last deep dive was into George Orwell’s dystopian novel Nineteen Eighty-Four. Putting it together took me some two years on and off of researching, writing and finessing and as fascinating a story as it turned out to be, it was I have to admit a somewhat depressing story. Having published it on the very day that marked the 119th anniversary of Orwell’s birth, I wanted to find something else to write about and — with so much negativity happening in the world right now — was keen for it to be something positive. The question was what subject matter to choose?
Having spent a few weeks listening to the new Harry Styles album, watching footage of his live performances as well as various reaction videos, my first thought was to do a deep dive into a song from Harry’s House. However, my mind was changed when I saw him perform a song from his last album in Dublin. It was one I wasn’t that familiar with, but everything about it fitted my brief. That song was Treat People With Kindness. And I set myself the challenge of finding out the story behind it.
So, in the words of Harry himself: Here we go now!
The first thing to say, is TPWK was the last song written for his previous album. Released on 13 December 2019 it was the sixth and last single taken from it.
The song’s meaning: This isn’t hard to decipher, the title says it all. It’s all about appealing to the generosity of human spirit. An upbeat gospel-infused show tune, the song radiates positive vibes, of love, of acceptance, and of having a good time.
When asked about the meaning behind it, Styles said:
“It’s about being a lot nicer to each other”
The title dates back to 2017. During debut concert tour, Styles sported a badge on his guitar strap that read “TPWK,” short for Treat People With Kindness. The singer started printing the motto on T-shirts and other tour merchandise in order to promote a message of love, kindness and acceptance. It became his go-to slogan, and in the fall of 2019, cryptic posters featuring the acronym “TPWK” were spotted worldwide as part of the publicity campaign for his Fine Line album release.
In a Rolling Stone interview, Styles said:
“I told Jeff (Bhasker), I’d love to someday write a song called Treat People With Kindness. And he was like, ‘Why don’t you just do it?’ It made me uncomfortable at first, because I wasn’t sure what it was — but then I wanted to lean into that. I feel like that song opened something that’s been in my core.”
The writers: Along with Harry himself, the song has two other co-writers: Jeff Bhasker and Ilsey Juber. I’d heard Bhasker’s name before, but didn’t really know much about him other than he had collaborated with Kanye, and I knew nothing at all about Juber.
Jeff Bhasker — Grammy award-winning producer Bhasker contributed to all but one track on Styles’ debut album. His other credits include Fun’s We Are Young, Kanye West’s All Of The Lights and Mark Ronson’s Uptown Funk.
The 47-year-old was born in Kansas City, grew up in Socorro, New Mexico and has lived in Los Angeles for the past 15 years. His father is from India.
He was previously married to Swedish singer Lykke Li (Li Lykke Timotej Zachrisson) They share a son named Dion who was born in February 2016.
Californian singer-songwriter Ilsey Juber is the daughter of Hope and Laurence Juber, who was the lead guitarist for Paul McCartney and Wings from 1978 to 1981. Her other writing credits include Shawn Mendes’ Mercy, Martin Garrix (featuring Bebe Rexha)’s In The Name Of Love and Mark Ronson (featuring Miley Cyrus)’s Nothing Breaks Like A Heart.
Styles said he took encouragement from a David Bowie interview clip when making the song.
“When I first wrote it I wasn’t sure if I really liked it or really hated it, but as it was going on I was like, ‘Oh I really like this, this is really fun.’”
He went on to explain:
“I’d seen this clip of David Bowie saying that you usually end up doing your best work when you feel like you can’t quite touch the bottom, and realising that the fact that it made me feel a little uncomfortable didn’t mean it was a bad song was big thing.”
The recording: Produced by Jeff Bhasker, TPWK was recorded at EastWest Studio in Los Angeles and Diamond Mine Studios in Queens, NY.
A string quartet arranged by Bhasker as well as members of the Sunday Service Choir fill out the track.
This instrumental version helps you appreciate what the musicians are playing:
The Musicians: The track features Ilsey Juber’s father Laurence on guitar, Elizabeth Pupo-Walker on congas, Nick Movshon on bass and Homer Steinweiss on drums.
The latter three are associated with New York City’s contemporary soul and funk music scene and Daptone Records, and some of the recording took place at Movshon and Steinweiss’ studio The Diamond Mine.
Also on the song were cellist Jacob Braun and violinists Ludwig Goransson and Tereza Stanislav.
Jeff Bhasker played piano and mellotron and also sang backing vocals along with Tiffany Smith and Tiffany Stevenson.
But the most prominent voices are that of Jess Wolfe and Holly Laessig of US pop duo Lucius.
Originally invited to the studio to work on a different song; during their sessions, Styles asked them to sing on the instrumental recording. Styles would later record his vocals.
Though they were named as vocalists in the album’s liner notes, the duo are not officially listed as a feature artist and in a 2022 LA Times interview they claimed they were miffed at not being properly credited for their contribution to the song.
“We start the song, we sing every chorus, just us. We trade off the bridge. It is us and Harry Styles. Harry Styles and us.”
Aside from the collaboration with the track, in December 2019, Jess and Holly also performed side-by-side with Styles at The Forum during the Fine Line launch concert in Los Angeles.
The song was engineered by Jens Jungkurth and Ryan Nasci and mixed by Spike Stent at EastWest Studios.
The lyrics:
Maybe we can find a place to feel good/And we can treat people with kindness/ Find a place to feel good/
I got a good feeling, I’m just takin’ it all in/ Floating up and dreamin’, droppin’ into the deep end/ And if we’re here long enough/ They’ll sing a song for us (ah-ah-ah-ah)/ And we’ll belong/
Maybe we can find a place to feel good/ And we can treat people with kindness/ Find a place to feel good/
Giving second chances, I don’t need all the answers/ Feeling good in my skin, I just keep on dancin’/ And if we’re here long enough/ We’ll see it’s all for us/ And we’ll belong/
Maybe we can find a place to feel good/ And we can treat people with kindness/ Find a place to feel good/
And it’s just another day (and it’s just another day)/ And if our friends all pass away (ah-ah, ah-ah)/ It’s okay (it’s okay, it’s okay, it’s okay)/ It’s okay, it’s okay, yeah!/ Hey!/ Here we go now/
Maybe we can find a place to feel good/ And we can treat people with kindness/ Find a place to feel good/
All we ever want is automatic all the time/ All we ever want is auto all of the time/ All we ever want is automatic all the time/ All we ever want is auto all of the time/
Maybe we can (all together now!) (One more time!)/ Find a place to feel good (oh yeah!)/ And we can treat people with kindness (just a little bit of kindness)/ Find a place to feel good (ow!)
To me, the one line that really jars is when he sings “And if our friends all pass away, it’s okay.” I have no idea of the thinking behind that. If “pass away” means to die, how can a friend dying ever be alright?
The video: Directed by Ben and Gabe Turner who have worked with Styles since One Direction emerged on The X Factor, making videos for Steal My Girl and Drag Me Down.
The black and white video features Styles and Fleabag mastermind Phoebe Waller-Bridge doing a choreographed dance routine. It features Styles performing at a night club where he invites Waller-Bridge to dance with him. The cinematography and setting recall the era of classic dance films from Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers.
As Gabe Turner recalled:
“Harry and I went to watch Phoebe do her live Fleabag show in London. We met her afterwards and she was the kindest, most delightful person ever. The next day I was watching dance videos randomly and one of them was this Nicholas Brothers video from the 1920s. It was two brothers dancing. I said to Harry, “You and Phoebe, question mark.” And he messaged back saying, Treat People With Kindness. Then he called Phoebe and was like, “I’ve got this song. I want to do a video. What about me and you doing this dance routine?” And she was like, “Great.” And then the two of them called Paul Roberts, the choreographer.”
Even if this isn’t the exact Nicholas Brothers dance sequence that inspired Gabe Turner, it’s worth watching because one can see the stylistic influences and visual cues and, not least, because it’s just amazing. It’s a clip from Stormy Weather, a 1943 movie, colorized with DeOldify and apparently, it was all done in a single take!
Studio One, Jacksons Lane in North London was used as a rehearsal space for the TPWK video in February 2020.
Filming took place at East London’s Troxy early in 2020. However it wasn’t released until New Year’s Day 2021, more than a year after Fine Line came out. As Gabe Turner recalled:
“It was joyous with loads of people dancing. It reminds you of a time when life was really fun.”
Phoebe Waller-Bridge dances alongside Styles in matching Gucci outfits. Custom-made for the video by Gucci’s creative director, Alessandro Michele, his consisted of a pair of cream wide-legged high-waisted trousers, a tonal Argyle knit teamed with a white shirt dotted with rhinestones, an oversized sequin black bow tie and a cropped silver sequinned dinner jacket. Hers substituted a plain cream jacket and a cream blouse with a stand collar and gathered, sequined billowing sleeves.
The dancing was choreographed by Paul Roberts (born Paul Robert Househam in 1973) an award-winning London based choreographer and staging director behind the Spice Girls and One Direction.
Paul first worked with Styles during his time in One Direction and they have continued their partnership into his solo career.
The stylist on the video was Harry Lambert.
My take on the video: In researching this story, I’ve probably listened to TPWK in various forms well over 100 times. That’s a lot. However, I’ve yet to grow bored with the song or not want to hear it again. The same can be said for the video, which I’ve viewed more times than I care to admit. I genuinely think it stands up as a great piece of work. Not only does the video perfectly match the song, it actually enhances it. What’s more, I think it adds a new dimension to Harry Styles as a showman and dancer.
It’s not a complicated idea. Styles is a performer — a song and dance man — at a time some years back. That it’s in black and white and the costumes evoke a bye-gone age, makes you think it’s set in the past, most likely sometime in the 1930s or 40s. There are lots of nods to this era, from the fan style stage panels, and the choice of font for the TPWK sign, to the cocktail glasses and vintage style microphone.
But look more closely and you’ll see there’s no attempt at making this a faithful recreation as musicians from Styles’ touring band complete with contemporary instruments also appear onstage. At least they do at the beginning of the video.
The location is a club, a cabaret venue. The set itself is restricted to a stage and the area in front of it where guests are sat at tables.
The first person we see is not Styles, but the British actress Phoebe Waller-Bridge. She enters the club and after confidently descending a staircase, ends up seated at one of the tables close to the stage. She’s dressed in a jacket, waistcoat and trousers and with her short dark hair she could almost pass as a man.
At the same time, Styles appears on stage wearing an almost identical outfit and immediately he begins dancing. Around him are a troupe of dancers. Styles shows off his dance moves before spotting Phoebe at the table. He jumps off stage and bounces from one table to another before ending up on her table.
He takes her hand and the two take to the stage, casting off their jackets (and his oversized sparkly bowtie) on the way. They now sashay together, although it’s interesting that Phoebe pretty much takes the lead. As Styles energetically dances with her, the other dancers dance in the background. It’s been suggested that Phoebe’s character is intended to represent Styles’ feminine side and I think that’s a plausible observation.
Both performers bring tremendous vitality to their dance moves, which work so well with the music and the song’s lyrics. I have to say Paul Roberts’ choreography is superb, fully deserving of winning the award for Best Choreography in the 2021 MTV Video Music Awards.
It probably required numerous takes, but the final video doesn’t ever feel that it’s anything but a single take. Whenever we cutaway to either of their faces, not only do they look like they’re having a great time, but they always seem to be ‘selling’ the song.
As someone commented when it was first released: “If this doesn’t make you smile, nothing will. It’s pure joy distilled into a music video, a message of hope after a rather hopeless year.”
Here’s a behind the scenes video that captures just how much Harry and Phoebe were enjoying themselves:
Sadly, there was to be a dark cloud.
Dani Hampson: One of the professional dancers performing in the TPWK video was 34-year-old Danielle Hampson who can be seen wearing a black beret.
The Leicester-born dancer, who had performed alongside many well-known celebrities including the Spice Girls on their 2019 Spiceworld tour, shared her pride at performing with Harry taking to social media to say the experience would be something she would “cherish forever”.
“Breaking my social media detox to share this very special moment of 2020.”
“To all the dancers I got to share these days with, unknowingly my last as a dancer. You are the sparkle this world needs and I hope you get to shine again very soon.”
It was to be her swansong as a dancer as she was pregnant.
Tragically, on Saturday 18 June 2022 Dani lost her life just hours before she was due to be married to former X Factor star, 28-year-old Tom Mann. The pair had already pushed back their wedding plans twice before due to the pandemic. Apparently she died in a car crash in the early hours of the morning.
Their son, Bowie, was just eight-months-old when his mother died.
The song’s success: On 28 April 28 2022, Treat People With Kindness was certified gold by the RIAA.
It’s no surprise that TPWK has proved a special crowd favourite during Styles’ live shows, with the audience singing along to every word and, curiously, many of them spontaneously doing the conga!
Here’s a performance from Madison Square Garden during ‘Harryween’
And here’s TPWK in Dublin during Harry’s 2022 European stadium tour:
This performance is from Amsterdam on 9 July 2022:
Covers: As with all Harry Styles’ songs, lots of people have covered TPWK. Here’s some of the most interesting versions:
This cover by Syndee Winters and Riley Costello is very faithful to the original, although to me, their version doesn’t add any anything new:
Here’s a slowed down, piano version by Mexican singer Birdy:
Perhaps the most unexpected cover is this one by The United States Air Force Band:
The prize for the worst cover I’ve heard has to go to Anna Rammel with this abomination:
Last, but not least, here’s an acapella version by Harry himself:
A few words about kindness: Having talked about the song and the meaning behind it, I wanted to end with a word or two on the power of kindness itself.
In an article in the May 2021 edition of the Harvard Business Review, three behavioural scientists, Ovul Sezer, Kelly Nault and Nadav Klein, write about the power of kindness in the workplace. They believe:
“Practicing kindness by giving compliments and recognition has the power to transform our remote workplace.”
They go on to explain why this is important:
“Being recognised at work helps reduce employee burnout and absenteeism, and improves employee well-being, Gallup finds year after year in its surveys of U.S. workers. Decades of research have shown that receiving a compliment, words of recognition, and praise can help individuals feel more fulfilled, boost their self-esteem, improve their self-evaluations, and trigger positive emotions.”
They then add:
“Being kind brings a sense of meaning because it involves investing in something bigger than ourselves. It shapes both how others perceive us — which improves our reputation — and how we view ourselves.”
“Consistently, we found that giving compliments actually made people happier than receiving them.”
They conclude:
“The power of kindness can mitigate the ill effects of our increasingly online social world. It’s an essential leadership skill that can cascade through people, changing the culture of the workplace along the way.”
Postscript: For its Christmas 2022 advert — which focuses on kindness and the community — Marks & Spencer used Treat People With Kindness as its soundtrack. The ad was premiered on 4 November 2022.
About the author: Based in Sussex-by-the-Sea, on England’s south coast, Gary is a creative writer and image-maker. He specialises in creating out of the ordinary portraits of musicians and people with interesting faces, as well as photographing some of the world’s finest flowers and gardens, not forgetting an array of automotive exotica.
On the writing side, he has used his research skills to author deep dives into some noteworthy songs beginning with Bryan Ferry’s ‘These Foolish Things’ ‘Ghost Town’ by The Specials, ‘Real Wild Child’ by Ivan and ‘All The Young Dudes’ by Mott the Hoople.
He has also written a biography of Robert Palmer and the stories behind Whitesnake’s blatant Led Zep rip-off, ‘Still Of The Night’, Harry Styles’ anthem to positivity, ‘Treat People With Kindness’ and the little known Queen track ‘Cool Cat.’
Most recently, Gary has penned the fascinating story behind George Orwell’s dystopian novel ‘Nineteen Eighty-Four.’ as well as ‘Believe It Or Not’ a look into the rise of fake news.
All these can be found here on Medium, along with his reviews of gigs and events and chats with musicians including the likes of Royal Blood, Joe Satriani and Wolf Alice.
